Four Ways of Avoiding Self-Destruction

Shame is a negative feeling directed at yourself, such as saying, “I’m a bad person” instead of “I did a bad thing.” Shame often drives self-destructive behaviors to ease that pain. Engaging in those behaviors perpetuates the shame and leads to more self-destructive behaviors. This can be a hard cycle to break. Start by replacing little harmful behaviors with those that are healthy and which foster pride, the antithesis of shame. For example, instead of telling a white lie, tell the truth. Take responsibility for your little messes and make positive lifestyle choices that promote good physical and mental health. Improving your self-image will help you let go of the shame, and you’ll be less likely to want to engage in the behaviors that bring it back.

WISDOM K.E HAMMOND 4 years ago

Avoiding Self-Destruction …How do you come out of this deadly web that is eating many lives up?

Self-destruction is the worst resolve anyone can reach in their life. It is a sad thing to kill oneself gradually or abruptly. Yet, many people end up in this situation and waste no time settling in it till they end their own lives. But is there any ways to avoiding this situation or stepping out of it? Yes, if you will take these steps seriously.

Ways of Avoiding Self-Destruction

#1 Avoid Envy

If you aim at Avoiding Self-Destruction, deal with envy. Envy we hardly noticed or admitted this because it does not seem right for people to destroy themselves just because they envy others.

Well, it doesn’t have to be right. When people hate themselves, it is sometimes because they have their image beside the images of others and have agreed with themselves that they do not have what others have and are not good enough.

It is therefore important that we avoid comparing ourselves to others and focus on how to better our performances as students, workers, players, etc. Turning our attention on ourselves to improve our lives keeps us away from being tempted to envy others. And by not envying, we have no time to destroy our beautiful self.

#2 Be Self-Confident

Lack of confidence leads to self-dislike. When you can’t trust yourself to be on top of your game, and boldly express your points in the presence of others, to carry yourself out in the open because you feel you don’t look attractive, or not to defend yourself because you feel intimidated by others’ presence, you curl up like a snail and start believing you are nothing and do not deserve to be around.

That is not true. The last in a class can graduate and become the president of his country. Our present condition is not a curse, but a reminder that we need to accept who we are and turn it into a success for a worthy tale.

So, we must not nurse any complex of inferiority. When we delve into it, we could end up hating ourselves and ultimately give room to self-isolation, which is a recipe for self-destruction. In plain English, be confident. Just be sure you know what you have to say or do and execute it without thinking twice.

#3 Meditate When Idle

“An idle mind is the devil’s workshop” is not a cliché. When you spend times doing nothing, you will have negative thoughts. If the negative thoughts come in, they will invade your mind and it won’t be too long before you take actions that could destroy you.

So try meditations. Meditation is good for us as it helps us to empty our minds. As Ajahn Brahm said, “Meditation is like a gym in which you develop the powerful mental muscles of calm and insight.”

Meditation can help us resist self-destruction and keep us in the right frame of mind to appreciate ourselves and love who we are enough to stay safe and collected. So, when you hate yourself, go for meditation. But above all, adhere to meditation to avoid self-destruction.

#4 Help Others

Helping others is kindly helping oneself. The energy we spend helping others stimulates a positive vibration that makes us feel useful and therefore indispensable. Those feelings inform our brain that we cannot destroy ourselves but sustain ourselves to be ready to help others who need us.

Everywhere to help. At school, we could choose to assist a junior who may need some coaching in a subject we are good at. At home, we could be useful by cleaning and helping with some house chores. Even by simply listening to someone telling us their problems and encouraging them to keep going, we are already helping and should be proud to be alive.

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Helping people can make our problems and concerns look insignificant enough to live without trying to destroy ourselves. Helping others keeps us busy and happy. We cannot think of destroying ourselves when others have expert opinions about us. So help others when you can to avoid yourself.

The world is a mysterious place. If you want to be happy, choose to look at the right sceneries. The place and people we choose to look at and how we look can affect our lives positively or negatively. We only have a short time to live. So, it is better to spend our time enjoying living than to hate living. And to make sure of this, a religious application of these steps can keep us safe from self-destruction.

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